As a kid, I usually tinker with my dad's things, whenever he was around, or not, hehe, depending on my curiosity, but mostly because I was missing him (he was an OFW when I was growing up). That's when I found out about the times when he was also trying to learn the guitar or that he has an interest in photography, experimenting with this big ol' camera that he had (which I just found out recently from him was a pentax slr).
Yesterday, I had an interesting conversation with him. I just told him that I started photography again (My high school elective was Film Photography and I gave him my recognition award after finishing it =) ), experimenting on both films and digital photography. I told him that though I love both forms, I'm currently more in love with film.
He's the first one to fully understand me in that sense. He then told me that when he was working in Kodak lab, he used to sneak out during lunch, taking his Pentax camera out and shoot around, mostly on leaves and flowers (flowers, my father, haha!) and then go back to the lab and process the film himself. "Libre na yun, haha!", he said. He went on telling the story, nostalgic about getting excited on developing the film and being satisfied with the results.
And during the conversation, I can picture him clearly walking around, taking shots, because I also had experienced it. Maybe, if we've talked about it without me engaging on the same activities, I wouldn't be able to relate and join him on that short journey.
Journey. That moment, strike me then. We were crossing the same path, on a different timeframe. Someday, my kid (syempre claim haha) or Andrei, my nephew, might have the same interest, and I'll be having the same conversation again in the future, this time telling them about my experience and their Lolo's experience.
And that gave me peace. Isn't it nice to know someone you love? Isn't it nice to know that you share something inspite of the gap, i.e. age or place? Isn't it nice that even if others don't get you, one single person on earth (pwede ring venus or mars) knows what you're talking about and that person is the one that loves you the most? Sharing common interests is not enough, maybe experiencing the same situations can start it, but overall, it's the love that you share that connects you both, inspite of time and space.
This comes from knowing yourself and those that you love. It was overwhelming to experience that "light bulb" moment. And as he continued on with his story, I gazed on the wisdom of years between us both. I absorbed all the lessons he imparted me with, though I know that just listening to him is not enough to learn all the things that he had acquired all these years.
During our conversation though, there's just one point from him that I struggled with, which was to slowly move away from playing the keys (not to quit on music, but lessen the activities) and concentrate on other things. Like sons/daughters, we tend to believe that reaching a certain age gives you the license to say, "I know what I'm doing. No one can stop me...". But you know how fathers are; they tend to see the big picture. And though, he explains his reasons, he still, as always, will give me the choice to make the final decision. He ends it with, "Pero tama na yan, dyan ka na lang sa photography.".
As a kid, I'm always "pasaway", hehe, but my father has always had the patient heart with me. My love and respect doesn't only come from him being my father, but also because of all the years we shared together... more so because combined with the patience, he always has the firm hand of a father (ndi naman sya namamalo, but you get the point) whenever I'm about to go astray.
There was this one time, when I was about 10, when I wanted to play in the rain, just as my brother was allowed to do. But the night before, I was running a fever so my father won't let me. I did the paawa effect, the tantrums, everything, but my father was firm. I know that he wanted to let on a couple of times, but being a disciplinarian, he knows that if he lets go that day, it will not be for my own good. I didn't understand that day, I was a kid, but it left a mark.
He knows me too well. I know now because my grandmother, my mom and even my aunts will tell stories about my father. From those stories, I can get a hint that even though I look like my mom, I am like my dad. He knows that too, maybe from the day that I was born. He understands me, because I am his daughter, blood and all.
KC (o ang jologs na hehe), recently visited her dad in the US. On one of their conversations, Gabby told her "I knew that something would happen in your life that would make you run back and find me.'
And yeah it's true for all daughters like me. I'm glad, kahit ndi ako kasing ganda ni KC (haha!), I always have my father to run to whenever something happens in my life, good or bad.
"For whom the LORD loveth he correcteth; even as a father the son in whom he delighteth." - Proverbs 3:12
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